Dems Learn to Sh*tpost

Aug 15

Eight years ago, they called us cucks, libtards, and globalists. We were corrupted by cultural Marxism, teaching our kids to hate themselves. Four years ago they gloated over drinking liberal tears. They called us sheeple, groomers, vampires, pedos. We made up a pandemic so that we could brew up a kill shot, and force it on everyone after making ourselves soy-boy sick. We were exposing our kids to trans strippers in the library and showing them how to use buttplugs in kindergarten. When our children were sufficiently deranged and submissive, we drained them of adrenochrome and mutilated their privates.

JD Vance’s ONE JOB was to turn this bullying into policy, and encode it in the pages of Project 2025. Peter Thiel sent him forth to blend every shitpost into a radioactive slurry to power a cybertruck convoy carrying the titans of New Right capitalism into Washington.

He tried. He really did.

But then came the stories about him. That he fucked a couch. He wrote about it in his book, someone said. Someone else said he was getting off on dolphin porn. The lies spread, with glee and schadenfreude. And he folded. Like a foldaway.

Suddenly, all the green drained out of million shriveling Pepes and made the world verdant with hope. And from the middle of a cornfield football grid, Tim Walz manifests with his Big Dad grin and said, "Let’s roll up our sleeves and beat these creepy weirdos.”

Today we’ll talk about fighting conspiracy theories that started as jokes with jokes that defuse conspiracy theories. About what it takes to commandeer the attention economy, and how much of our souls we spend to do it. About the difference between meme wars and policy debates, and how far the Big Dad Energy vibes can take us.